Looking forward to listening to this one. There’s a character in a Stephen King book who loses his wife. After grieving a while, he’s having a conversation with his brother-in-law, his dead wife’s brother. His brother says “Guys. ‘I’ll be all right. And if we’re not, we try to make sure no one knows it.” And the lead character remembers that his wife “once said that if I was drowning at Dark Score Lake… I would die silently fifty feet out from the paddle beach rather than yell for help… if someone asks me ‘Are you all right?’ I can’t answer no. I can’t say help me.”
I look forward to hearing what y’all think about the gendered nature of asking for help. I think the patriarchy has a great deal to do with men’s struggles to do that — we can ask our buddy to help us lift a fridge or build a shed, but we can’t say “I’m not okay, I’m hurting, and I feel like I can’t go on.” And that hurts us dudes.
Looking forward to listening to this one. There’s a character in a Stephen King book who loses his wife. After grieving a while, he’s having a conversation with his brother-in-law, his dead wife’s brother. His brother says “Guys. ‘I’ll be all right. And if we’re not, we try to make sure no one knows it.” And the lead character remembers that his wife “once said that if I was drowning at Dark Score Lake… I would die silently fifty feet out from the paddle beach rather than yell for help… if someone asks me ‘Are you all right?’ I can’t answer no. I can’t say help me.”
I look forward to hearing what y’all think about the gendered nature of asking for help. I think the patriarchy has a great deal to do with men’s struggles to do that — we can ask our buddy to help us lift a fridge or build a shed, but we can’t say “I’m not okay, I’m hurting, and I feel like I can’t go on.” And that hurts us dudes.
It’s such a big topic and I think we just touched the surface here but I look forward to hearing what you think!